All-State Blues

Can't write long, but I just wanted to get this down.

I'm bummed. I had a big exciting day: skipped school (don't worry, it's a field trip), sang for rich and famous people, got a picture taken with a couple of the players from the NY Nicks, went to Gameworks, and picked up some books I've been waiting for. But all I can think of is the announcement.

At our pre-show Starbucks run, Laura mentioned that she found out she was going to All-State. Apparently it was going on the announcements today, but she had found out early because she had stopped by the choir room and seen the packets. The way she explained it made it sound like there were quite a few of them.

In the bustle of figuring out how I'm going to avoid a serious tongue-lashing for not having my tie, the replacement tie, black slacks, or black socks, I forgot to ask Mrs. Alatsis if my name was on one of those packets. Post-show, she decides to announce it (probably didn't want any extra pressure on people), and the lucky people are: Laura and Joey.

So I've been depressed. On the upside, Mrs. Alatsis didn't see my lack of proper attire, and her comments afterward were solely about my confidence in how well I'd learned the notes. (I used the folder to cover my shirt, and was so sure she noticed the lack of a tie that I looked into it to avoid her gaze)

But just about all I can think about is not having the chance to go to All-State. Despite my lack of contact with most of the people I met there, last year's All-State is still a defining moment in my life. The music, the director, and most of all the atmosphere that alternated between the complete focus and zany randomness that only happens in the performing arts.

I'm not mad at Joey or Laura: they completely deserve it. They weren't even competition with me, because they sing Tenor and Soprano. But whenever I explain that to myself, a part of me answers "don't you deserve it too?" And on a very minimal level, we were competing, because each school that auditions two people of different voice parts is guaranteed to have one admitted.

I tried to explain to Joey what All-State Choir is, though I suppose I was really trying to explain what it means to me. He didn't really seem to get it, though we were both tired. We slept most of the way home.

One last thing that's been racing through my head. Since the day All-State was over, I've been dreaming about the next step up: All-Northwest Choir. It runs every other year, and next year is the year. Now I'm worried; if getting into All-State is so hit-and-miss, what are my chances of making All-NW next year?

Fortunately I've got more shows and party-planning to keep me busy.

-Chops


P.S. Another reason why this is such a big letdown for me is that a lot of the people I'm still in contact with from last year are doing it again this year.